Sex Drive & Kink

I wonder if a high sex drive and a love of kink are linked. I wonder if it’s possible to have an unusually high libido yet only desire vanilla sex and, conversely, whether anyone has a strong urge for kinky sex yet doesn’t really care whether they get.

Surely if you love sex and want it often, you’re not going to do the same thing each and every time. Does having a high libido push one to look for thrills that vanilla sex just cannot satisfy? Maybe some people actually do want to have sex three times a day, missionary, with the lights out.

I guess it could be possible for a person’s thoughts and fantasies to be wild, crazy and taboo but they just doesn’t feel like acting them out very often because they really can’t be bothered. Possible, but it doesn’t seem very likely to me. I mean, those who love BDSM, for example, usually really, really love it. I’ve never heard anyone say, “Yeah, I kind of like it when they tie me up, gag me and then use me roughly, ignoring my pleas for mercy. But I’m not that bothered really. I can take it or leave it.”

 There must be a connection somewhere in the brain between a person’s sexual needs and fantasies, but I wonder what it is and where it comes from.

What do you think?

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  1. Bren says:


    I think you may be on to something. I, for one, believe that there is a correlation between these things and a high libido…

    I could have sex five times a day…even more with a partner…just kidding…but seriously, the mind is a powerful aphrodisiac. With it and a willing playmate, tons of fantasies can be played out. If I had a partner with half my drive, I think I would never leave the home.

    On another note, have you thought of creating an interactive story post section…I have an idea I would like to share with you…just to test out a potential feature…

    Thanks, again!


    • Charlotte says:

      Hello again Bren, it’s nice to hear that I am not the only one so obsessed!

      I like your idea very much. Sort of like a Second Life role play but without the avatars. I will think it over and see what I can do with it *smiles*

  2. Sid says:


    Interesting thought. Not sure if I have a very high sex drive, but I am creative person that thinks and creates in images and thereby how that makes one feel. So I find that a lot of my need to play with these ideas is almost an artistic release as well as a sexual one. Picking up a point from an earlier post, a previous partner would always need to have believability and continuity in the storeys, which I fear is some what missing from most filmed porn i.e. get to the money shot quickly and not worry about back story?

    Ahh… if only one could project to screen ones own mental images.


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